I have recently discovered that I've been searching for the wrong thing. You see, all this time I've been searching for the perfect man to complement Nadya Dee. A man who could be the yang to my yin. For some reason I have this ideal man in my mind. A man who says and does all the right things. A man who vibrates on the same level as me mentally, emotionally, spiritually, metaphysically, intellectually and sexually.
So all this time while I'm secretly longing for this perfect man, I mess around with guys who might complement me mentally but not emotionally and sexually. Or men who are my perfect matches sexually but are no where near me spiritually and intellectually.
Then I get down on myself for being to picky while simultaneously kicking myself when I find that I've fallen prey to one who barely adds up.
This painstaking search for the ultimate mate has left me at odds. What am I doing wrong???
I've tried doing the casual no-strings-attached sex thing and while physically exhilarating it wasn't wholly fulfilling at all.
Then I tried making a "connection" first before falling into bed, at which point... I was almost always left disappointed. Good sex only seems to come to me from men who don't stimulate me intellectually or emotionally. I suppose we all have our weaknesses. I'm sure I've never been the perfect woman for any of my "men". Then again...I never put any thought or effort into doing so anyways.
In any case, I've decided to stop trying to put the pieces of this elaborate puzzle called my perfect man together. Rather I'll be searching for the perfect penis. That penis that hooks into me and never let's go. Not saying that I haven't had my fair share of pretty awesome penises in the past (shouts to all my ex-sex buddies wid di lef hook ;o) but for the coming year even though I have no sex prospects I WILL NOT settle for any relationship that doesn't come with a readily available big and beautiful buddy.
Yes. I will have faith. Faith that, one day soon, the perfect penis will find me...and subsequently the perfect man will be in tow.
just hopes I recognise the perfect penis when it cums ;oP