2.14.2010

Gaijin Hunters


I have often complained about how difficult it is for a gaijin [foreigner] woman in Japan to "date" a Japanese man. Especially a strong black woman like myself who tends to be overly-assertive and even aggressive at times. Based on my observations the majority of Japanese men tend to be timid, barely making eye contact with me much less starting a conversation and eventually asking me out. And as assertive as I may be, when it comes to the opposite sex I enjoy being pursued. Plus I'm not going to go out of my way to seek the affections of a man, regardless of his race. I would rather hug up a big mango tree!

However women going out of their way to procure a mate seems to be the norm over here. Personally I think it's because Japanese culture is highly chauvinistic. Women, to this day are still somewhat required to be seen and not heard; just stay home, make bentos and have babies. So why then would a Japanese man go through the trouble of learning English just to meet a Western woman who is only going to back answer him when he has a nice Japanese woman who is eager to do everything he needs and more. Hell if I was a gaijin man I'd get me a Japanese wife too!

That being said, I've observed the complete opposite case, in terms of dating, with my male gaijin counterparts. I mean a regular old Tom, Dick or Harry comes from the West to Japan and all of a sudden he's an Adonis! (not to my eyes but certainly to Japanese women) I mean Japanese women are practically throwing themselves at them! It's ridiculous. I go through almost 3 years in this country, being fairly capable of communicating in Japanese yet still a gaijin man can be in Japan for barely 3 months still unable to distinguish hello from thank you and he's already bagged 2-3 Japanese girls. JUST BECAUSE HE'S GAIJIN. It's bullshit and it only amplifies my frustrations.

Which leads me to the topic: Gaijin Hunters. For want of a better classification, a gaijin hunter is a Japanese woman who hangs around bars and clubs that gaijin men frequent for the sole purpose of scoring a gaijin boyfriend/ potential husband. So they study English and immerse themselves into this "foreigner culture" all in hopes of attracting a suitor who can one day take them back to their land. And of course 9 out of 10 times they succeed because most if not all gaijin men come to Japan to find a nice homely Japanese wife (or atleast get a piece ;o)

Now don't get me twisted, I am in no way saying that this is absolute. I know quite a few Japanese/Gaijin couples who are very happy together. I am mainly talking about the girls who throw themselves at gaijin men JUST BECAUSE they're gaijin. I mean they will stop at nothing to secure themselves a gaijin boyfriend. Some even willingly and knowingly put up with their adulterous behaviour. Well, duppy know who to frighten, cause not I!

Meanwhile, I sit here at the hinterland of my devotion to the black man wondering if it's time to step outside the box and start some "Nihonjin" [Japanese] hunting. Woe is me.


iNi

needs a bow and an arrow.

NadYa Dee